Watch out for the rabid Stand Your Ground Squirrels

Have you noticed those increasingly common rabid Stand Your Ground (SYG) Squirrels? You know, those crazy squirrels chasing other squirrels in yards filled with acorns.  What gives, you might ask? 

Squirrel hiding from a SYG Squirrel

They are defending their territory under vast oak trees. These trees provide more than enough acorns to last them well beyond the next year, but being highly possessive of the land to which they claim ownership, these SYG squirrels fend off others who even dare to look at their abundant and vast supply of acorns.  Theirs is a scarcity mentality, this despite the fact that most of these SYG squirrels claim allegiance to ancient squirrel scripture that identifies claims of ownership to the creator, and requires generous sharing with those who have little.  These SYG squirrels will literally kill another squirrel who attempts to take even one acorn from their over abundant grounds. 

Know, however, that these SYG squirrels are not selfish and greedy through and through. These territorial squirrels loathe when others from their neighborhood come onto their property, or even eye their acorns from above. Yet they will occasionally host a tea party for others like them, just so long as they are not seen as a threat, like those who aren’t quite so blessed as they believe themselves to be. 

Despite claims of ownership and self made prosperity, these SYG squirrels are living under fruitful trees, which they themselves didn’t plant, and on earth where other squirrels lived for centuries.  The previous stewards of this property would never have dreamed of “owning” something so sacred as the land, trees or even acorns. 

So if you see one of these SYG squirrels chattering with their cheeks full of acorns, warning others to stay away, know that this too shall pass. Every last acorn that they stored will one day either go to other squirrels or return back to the earth as mulch. They too will find themselves a part of the soil that will feed the trees that will some day nourish other squirrels.